Yeah, I did start this yesterday, but then I got tired. I got tired of sitting at the computer. But now I am back to finish what I started (even though it was in point form only lol).
This week has been mildly eventful.
Monday I took the day off. I only went outside long enough to grab the newspaper and the mail. It was good to just laze around the house and know that I didn't have any appointments to go to.
Tuesday I went for a massage and also had my dance class. The massage was really needed after all the practicing and dancing I did recently. Dance class was great, we went over the routine we have been learning, learned the parts we didn't have the time to learn before the trade show performance. We might end up performing 2 routines at Spectrum this summer, the one we learn next session and the one we are learning now. That way we can perform the routine the way we were supposed to. Learned a few 'new' moves and I have been practicing when I can. :D
Wednesday was my busiest day. I got my new hair (ie: wig) and a couple of head coverings. Then it was time to head off for my blood work and the teaching session for my chemo.
The teaching session provided me with a lot of answers to many questions. I also was provided with a huge binder full of material detailing all the particulars of my treatment. We went over what drugs will be used, what the side effects could/will be, personal care/nutrition and many other things I need to be aware of. Of course, all that material was just shown to me, but not read. That is what I will be doing with some of my time this weekend. Monday is the my first treatment.
Obviously, I am a bit nervous about what Monday will be like. And what the next 4-5 months will be like. Last night I had a dream about being in prison, I was scared that I would not be able to follow my treatment and care plan. I think this dream is just a representation of feeling trapped by this illness, feeling overwhelmed by the information given to me on Wednesday, and generally being anxious about the whole process. It feels like it is making more of an impact on my life this time, in that the treatment will last much longer this time. Even though I will be treated locally for chemotherapy, I do have radiation treatments again. That will mean travelling to Calgary again, wonder if I can take my cat...probably not :-(
Thursday was quiet, I ran an errand or two, did nothing much around the house (a few chores), and then off to dance class again. It is American Tribal Bellydancing on Thursdays, I love it a lot. We practiced our second routine all class as we have to perform two routines on Saturday for the Worlds of Women dinner (this is a charity in Medicine Hat that supports immigrant women). We haven't practiced the second routine since last year. It has only been performed once, and that was in November. We haven't done anything with it since then. But it came back pretty easily, although it is seriously in need of polishing (wow is it ever lol). I think we will do ok, maybe we will do it first so we can end with the routine we have been doing for over a year. That one we know pretty well. Our goal is to eventually be able to perform without having a choreographed routine, as that is the format for this style of dancing. We should be able to follow our leader by vocal and physical cues only. Which means we may do a different routine each time we perform. However, I do think there is some merit to a bit of choreography even in this style. :D
Today I did a bit of shopping, spent an insane amount of money on shampoo and conditioner for my head, something recommended for people going through chemo. Also, got some material for head scarves picked out, hope to have them in the next week or so. Right now I think I am managing the upcoming changes quite well. But I am sure that will change when I actually loose my hair. I just like to be prepared.
Right. So, tomorrow there is practice just after lunch and then I will head home to get organized and ready for the performance. It takes the 'professional' dancers over 2 hours to get dressed and made up. I took nearly that long on Sunday, so we shall see. :D
OH, and just an update on the song in my head phenomenon:
a few days ago I woke with "The Bird Dance" (I think that is the name of it) playing in my head "na na nana na na nah, na na nana na na nah....." - anybody want to square dance?? I haven't heard that song in ages LOL Most of the time the songs are ones I heard the day before, but every so often they are songs I haven't heard recently.
Anyway, I will be back to write about my first private performance, I am excited and nervous. Hopefully I won't get stage fright again.
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